Saturday, December 23, 2006

Perfection is highly overrated

In honor of those evil women who get everything done for the holidays and whose homes look like a Hallmark card, I have created a special list. It is a list of the things I meant to do, but didn't get done this holiday season:

  1. Give an open house party on Christmas Eve. Excuse: I'm tired.
  2. Wrap presents in a pretty and professional manner. Excuse: Do you really care how I wrap your present as long as you get one and its wrapped?
  3. Wrap all the presents. Excuse: This is specifically targeted at my friend Nancy in NC because if I had wrapped her family's presents, I wouldn't have gotten them mailed in time for Christmas since I finished knitting one of the presents on Thursday (yes, as in the Thursday before Monday's Christmas) at 4:15 and our post office closes at 5:00. So I just stuck To:/From: tags on the gifts without wrapping them. Sad, yes?
  4. Make cookies from scratch instead from a mix. Excuse: I'm tired.
  5. Buy my husband a really nice present. Excuse: Since my soon-to-be ex husband has been busted for sleeping with other women, he's lucky to get the book and sweater I bought him. Some may ask why I'm giving him presents at all. I'm really doing it for Monkey Boy so that I won't look like a Grinch in his eyes.
  6. Mail presents early. Excuse: God invented Priority Mail for a reason. I'm the reason.
  7. Put up all the Christmas decorations I have instead of just half of them. Considering the state of my life, I'm doing well to get a tree up at all, never mind decorate it. Plus, I'm tired. Notice a theme?
  8. Buy new Christmas outfit. Excuse: I keep waiting to wake up thin one morning and this hasn't happened yet.
So this is the real world. Monkey Boy will still have Christmas memories in spite of me not putting endless sets of lights in the front yard. People are still eating the cookies I made from a mix. Life will go on even if I'm not a domestic goddess. Lesson learned.


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